Learn to Fly

I recently accomplished a life-long goal of going skydiving.  I have always wanted to do it but have never put any effort into making it happen. Thanks to the support and company of my girlfriend Julianna, that dream was finally realized.  Here is a running diary of those events.

(Sometime in April)

11:05 Jules and I are riding in the back of a friend’s truck on our way to Festival of Colors.  For the record, this was not my idea.  I have been before and swore to myself that I would never go again.  Not that I hated it, I just inhaled enough colored chalk to last a life-time and didn’t need to experience that again.  So far Jules has talked me into doingthree  things that I swore I never would; willingly listen to LMFAO’s Party Rock Anthem, hike the Y, and go to festival of colors.  I’m not sure I like how easily she can persuade me. 

1:37 We are back in the truck on our way home from festival of colors.  With inches of chalk in our lungs, we start talking crazy and somehow skydiving comes up.  I say I’ve always wanted to go. Jules says she wants to go too.  I say, “This might be the colored chalk talking but seriously I think we should go skydiving… soon.”  She agrees and says we should look into it.  At this point I can’t tell if she is serious or just trying to act tough and adventurous.  Either way, she just agreed to jump out of an airplane. 

(A Few Days Later)

2:35 I am bored at work after having already read every article on grantland.com. I remember our conversation about skydiving and decide to look into it.  I see a few places, they are all around $200.  I then look on groupon.com and there just happens to be a deal for skydiving in Moab.  I buy it immediately and it’s official.  We are going skydiving. 

(April 28^th 2012)

8:52 We arrive at Canyonlands airport right on time for our 9:00 appointment.  When scheduling the appointment, I was told to call when we are in the terminal and they will come get us.  Everything about this company feels unorganized and unprofessional.  Most people would be worried about this but something about this feels right to me.  If I am gonna be jumping out of a plane I want everything leading up to that point to feel just as crazy. 

8:54 I call and someone says to wait in the terminal and they will be there shortly to give us the release forms. 

9:00 A guy named Paul comes in and hands us two documents to fill out and says he will be back in 15 minutes.   We fill out the information quickly.  Something about signing release forms just feels intense.  I have only had to do this a few times in my life and it has always been a memorable experience. 

9:15 No sign of Paul yet.  Jules is starting to get a little worried and questions the legitimacy of this operation they are running.

9:23 Paul comes back and leads us to their hangar.  We have the following conversation:

Paul- “So how did you hear about us?”

Me- “We bought the deal on groupon.”

Paul-“Oh you saw us online? Did you see our reviews?  They are TERRIBLE! Everyone seems to hate us! I don’t know why.”

            I had seen their reviews, and just to give you an idea this is what people were saying about them:

“This was the most unprofessional business person/company I've ever had to deal with. The man, owner, Paul was so rude. I watched my friends jump. They were told they could jump out of the plane together, when they got there, it was only 1 instructor and a very scary looking airplane. My friends were scared and Paul didn't help calm them down. I noticed the other skydiving center next to this one and it was busy, they had a nice plane, ping pong table, tv's computers, etc. I almost told my friends to get a refund and jump next door but I didnt say anything. This place is very scary. Do not go there.”

“Paul is a piece of work! A skilled craftsman on the one hand, a zany jokester on the other, Paul made my first skydiving experience one of the most scary experiences of my life. He messed with me at first telling me he hadn't had a lot of experience jumping, then later I found out that he's done anywhere from 8-9 thousand jumps.”

9:24 Reading reviews like this would scare most people, but I think if you are gonna go jump out of a plane then a guy like Paul is exactly who you want strapped to your back.  Sane people don’t dedicate their lives to jumping out of planes.  That’s why you need a crazy guy like Paul.  I’ve only known him for a couple minutes but I already trust him with my life. 

9:27 We get over to the hangar and there are about 7 people there to jump and a few staff members packing parachutes.  Paul sits us down in front of a tv and turns on our “training video.”

9:28 I can already tell that this isn’t a training video at all.  It is just someone’s video that they purchased.  It shows them in the plane, jumping, and then interview them after. 

9:31 The training is over and I somehow know less about skydiving than I did before.

9:32 Paul tells us to sit tight and it will be our turn after they get these people up.  We have a seat and wait our turn.

10:00 The first two jumpers have jumped and it’s obvious something has gone wrong.  We look out and see a parachute falling with no one attached to it.  The staff seems a little worried at first but then calm down and say that they had to do a “cutaway.”  This means that the parachute didn’t properly deploy so they had to release it and then use the reserve chute.  No one seems worried by this. 

10:20 One of the staff had to go drive a jeep to pick up the divers who had the cutaway.  They landed a couple miles from where they were supposed to.  They get back and everyone starts asking Alec, the instructor about what happened.  He says after he deployed the first chute something wasn’t right and they started spinning so he released it and then landed with the backup chute.  The staff seems pretty impressed and one even says, “Man I’m jealous I still haven’t got to do a cutaway.”

10:21 One of the staff members sees the concerned look on some of the people preparing to jump next.  He offers the following words of comfort: “Don’t worry about that.  This is skydiving.  S*** happens.”

I decided to help them out and create a flyer that they can start passing out to generate more business.

10:23-1:00 Nothing eventful happens in this time.  We are just sitting around waiting our turn.  Only two people can go up at a time and so it takes a while to get through this group in front of us. 

1:20 Foo Fighters’ Learn to Fly comes on the radio:

I'm looking to the sky to save me
Looking for a sign of life
Looking for something to help me burn out bright
I'm looking for a complication
Looking cause I'm tired of trying
Make my way back home when I learn to fly high

Fly along with me, I can't quite make it alone
Try to live this life my own (and)
Fly along with me, I can't quite make it alone
Try to live this life my own. . .

I'm pumped! Let's do this!!!

1:45 It is finally our turn to start getting ready so we get into our jump suits.  They are actually quite comfy.

1:50 Now we put on our harnesses.  They are not comfy.



1:55 Some pictures before we jump:



Jules wasn't so sure about this plane.  I kept telling her if the plane did have some issues we would just make sure to wear parachutes so we could jump before it crashes.



This would be the last time Jules smiled until we were safely on the ground



2:02 Alec (my instructor and also the guy who had to land with the backup chute earlier) takes us over to the plane and explains what we need to do when jump from the plane.  Put your feet over the edge and hold on to your harness.  That sounds simple enough. 

2:03 We load into the plane and this thing is tiny.  I go in first with Alec and then Jules and Paul.  So that we can shut the door of the plane, Jules has to help lift Paul’s leg to bring it in.  We are cramped and this is not going to be a comfortable ride.  I'm starting to doubt I'm even going to get a drink and peanuts on this flight. 

2:05 We take off and start climbing.  After a few minutes Alec shows me his altitude reader and says we are at 1,000 feet. It looks pretty darn high.  I ask him how high we go and he says 10,000 feet.  We got a ways to go.

2:15 We are getting close to the jump zone so they start attaching our harnesses.  This requires some awkward shifting in our tight space. 

2:18 We are ready to jump and the door is opened.  Crap just got real. 

2:19 Paul and Jules get ready to jump and just disappear.  Watching someone jump out of a moving plane is one of the weirdest things you will ever experience.  The only thing that is weirder is jumping out yourself. 

2:21 Alec and I shimmy over to the door and prepare to jump.  He counts to three and we are out.

2:21 I’m not even going to try to put in words what the next 30 seconds felt like.  All I can say is that it was the most thrilling experience I have ever had.

2:22 Alec pulls the cord and our chute deploys properly.  The view over Moab is pretty incredible.  Definitely chose the right place to go. 

2:23 Alec has me grab the handles for the parachute and I am in control.  He explains how to go right, left, and slow down.  I have the feeling that he is holding the lines just above where the handles are, so I kinda feel like a little kid sitting on his dad’s lap to “drive” but I don’t care, I’M ON TOP OF THE WORLD!

2:25 We are approaching our landing and I realize that I don’t know a thing about landing.  Somehow they didn’t cover that in our 5 hours of “training.”  I ask Alec and he tells me what to do with my legs.  We come in a little hot on the landing but if I can jump out of a plane at 10,000 feet and the only thing that happens to me is a sore bum then I’ll take it!

2:27 We gather our things and check out with Paul.  Jules bought a video and pictures but I didn’t.  She always makes fun of me for not taking pictures of stuff.  I’m just not very nostalgic I guess, either that or I’m just cheap.  I like to think that I live in the now. 

2:30 We get in the car and drive off to see Arches National Park.  I can already feel a loss of excitement from driving my car.  I have a feeling that everything I do from here on out will feel less exciting.  I guess that’s the price you pay for going skydiving.